funny answering machines

This is you-know-who. We are you-know-where. Leave your you-know-what you-know-when.

You have reached 234-1243. This is an answering machine. This is the new millennium. You know what to do.

Surprisingly, you have reached the number you have dialed. Please leave a message after the beep.

This is a boring answering machine message. Leave a message anyway.

So long as phones can ring and eyes can see, So leave a message, and I'll get back to thee.

This is 234-3249, and no, it's not Tony's Pizza. It's not the beauty shop either, and no one named Pamela lives here. You can leave a message though.

Hi. Do you ever feel, like, your head is full of sand, not your regular loose sand mind you, but compacted sand, and there were like bugs or something jumping up and down on the compacted sand? Well, sometimes I do. Leave your message.